The Meltdown
by xTsux
Summary: When Rey gets to the nuclear reactor, he begins to have doubts...
1. Chapter 1

**.::The Meltdown::.**

Ten Thousand Steps;

Tap, tap, tap.

My footsteps are the only sound in the darkness of the night, and they are light as a feather. I look down at my feet, covered only by white sneakers.

I wear a white shirt, with magenta colored pants, although the magenta is fading to a light pink, and the shirt is now almost gray from dirt.

This outfit almost reminds me of myself.

The time is two o'clock in the morning. The only things illuminating the way this dark night are the streetlights and the moon. I know there are police cars along the streets, but only in one basic area. The road that has all of the nightclubs. I do not cross that way; I go through the next street. I do this not to avoid the drunken freaks, but to avoid the officers. I do this because this is the way to the nuclear reactor.

Tap, tap, tap.

I never, ever thought myself lucky for having a small nuclear power plant nearby our town. But then again, it never crossed my mind that I would ever bring myself near it, even less towards it.

Everybody knew that it was there, and people often joked about it exploding and 'killing us all'. I did not find it funny. At all.

As I near the plant, I notice a shadow lurking by the entrance of the metal fencing.

There is a security guard.

It is expected. You wouldn't want the before mentioned explosion to actually occur, would you?

I turn on my heel and quickly slip to my right. The security guard seems to be dozing off, obviously a veteran of the job, knowing that nobody would bother targeting such a nameless plant in the first place. I take a deep breath and slide over slowly, carefully, holding my breath. While I stay silent, I can hear his loud snoring.

A disgrace of a metal gate now sits in front of me, a disgrace of a security guard next to me. There is a small lock on the gate. I peek over to the side and see a key in the man's pocket. Certainly a disgrace.

Before I know it, I'm inside and the still-sleeping worker is outside. He has certainly been asleep for quite some time; otherwise the creak of the door would have awoken him.

Tap, tap, tap.

The nuclear reactor is now in front of me. For some reason, I don't feel anything. I am staring at a large, smoking structure. My future.

But I have already played this scene out in my mind one too many times. I expected this.

Nothing happens as I walk around it. Nothing happens when I see the ladder. Nothing happens when I begin climbing. I go up, up, up. Tap, tap, tap. Tap, tap, tap. Tap, tap, tap.

Tap.

I stop, suddenly frozen. I can feel the heat radiating now, and my stomach begins to churn. My mind whirls and I don't know what to do. I cannot look down, I cannot look up. I feel myself shake slightly, but I take a deep breath and begin counting the number of rungs left.

One, two, three, four, five. My eyes scan over the rest.

There are exactly ten. I stare at them, re-counting over and over again. I lift my foot slowly, but it shakes.

Am I wavering?

No, that cannot be. I bring the same foot up again, and yet again it quivers in fear. I bring it back down, and it nearly slips off of the footing. My breath catches and I tighten my grip. Cautiously, I look down.

A mistake. The height makes me dizzy and I quickly turn back.

Yes, I am wavering. I am indecisive. Because I could make my trip into the city. Because I could confidently walk all the way. Because I could sneak past the sleeping shadow. Because I could fly up to the tip of my goal.

I made it, nine thousand nine hundred and ninety steps. I made it. But not to the very top.

Because, for an indecisive person, the last ten steps are always the hardest.

Ten Steps;


	2. Chapter 2

.::**The Meltdown**::.

Ten steps;

"Where are you looking?"

He would ask this every time my eyes wandered away; during long car rides, while watching television, when playing games outside... any time.

"There."

I would always reply simply and continue to ignore him. He was naive and easily frightened, and he always had been. I used to find it fun tormenting him, but it soon grew old and I was no longer interested in the sport. He became awfully boring after that. At least, until that one day we were secretly staying up and coloring underneath the covers with a flashlight.

"Where are you looking?" He questioned, leaning his head on my shoulder and taking his crayon off the page. I tried shaking him off, but he stayed put.

"There," I responded, as usual, continuing to scribble yellow on the paper.

"No, you're not."

It was the first time he had ever replied to me during this type of exchange. I stopped.

"What do you mean?" I said, "That makes no sense, I have to be looking somewhere."

"But you're not looking there," He muttered. I looked down at him, blinking, confused and wondering what the heck he was talking about. I had no certain 'there' in mind, I had always meant that I was looking somewhere.

Suddenly, I was aware of the beating in my chest. There was no way, Pat never paid much attention to anything other than coloring books. There was no way.

"Look at this," He grumbled, pointing to the book spread out in front of us. I did as I was told. "I colored her bow so perfectly, and you just went over it. You're doing it all bad, it doesn't even look like you're trying to stay in the lines, Rey." I stared at it. He was right, I had been randomly running my hands around and I completely messed up the baby. Relief spread through me.

"Sorry," was all that I managed to say. Pat nodded and changed the angle of the light a bit.

As soon as he started coloring again, the voices downstairs came back and I froze.

"Where are you looking?" Pat immediately repeated, and my head whipped over to stare at his small face. This time, however, his head wasn't tilted in that wondering manner. It was straight up and staring. His seven-year-old brown eyes were full of something my seven-year-old mind couldn't read.

"Th-"

"You're not looking there," He stated, "You're not looking anywhere."

And then he flicked off the flashlight.

It was the first time that I saw the actual Pat.

The Pat that he was hiding inside.

The second and last time in years I saw this Pat was only a few days later. Two, to be exact.

It was sudden, and it was scary. I hadn't been expecting it, even from listening in to their conversations for two years, I just didn't see it coming. I never thought that I would have to be separated from my only source of comfort. The person that was supposedly oblivious to the world around him.

"Rey," Pat had said. I had reluctantly torn my eyes from the television and looked at him. He'd smiled at me and suddenly he was embracing me. "Don't be afraid."

Only minutes later, Mother burst into the house and grabbed my wrist and ripped me away from him.

"M-Mommy!" I screeched. Pat got up and stared at us with huge eyes.

"Rey, we're leaving," She snapped, her brown eyes - the same shade as Pat's, yet so different - wild and screaming.

"What are you doing?" Dad's voice bellowed from the door. Both Pat and I whipped our heads over to stare, myself still dangling from my Mother's hand. Suddenly, Pat stepped up to me and grabbed my arm. Dad stormed over, yellling, "You can't just take him like that!"

Mother glared down at Pat and me, her eyes whipping back and forth between us. And then she sent her dark orbs to pierce my father. I looked at Pat in confusion, feeling myself begin to shake. Out of fear, though I didn't know it.

Our eyes immediately met and I froze. Suddenly, the argument in the background disappeared. It was almost as if I was drowning in him, but it didn't hurt. Not at all. Not the way that my wrist used to ache. Not the way that my stomach used to churn.

It was gone.

"Where are you looking?" Pat questioned slowly, and suddenly I felt myself being pulled away again.

"Pat!" I cried, and I felt tears welling in my eyes. He blurred. I repeated, "Pat!"

"Come back here!" My father's voice slurred back into reality, "You can't take him yet!"

"I can't stand you anymore!" Mom screamed, "I have to leave now!" My tears slipped down my cheeks pathetically and I began pulling against my mother's grip. I heard my father coming over.

"Stop it, Mommy!" I exclaimed, "Pat!" I wiped my eyes with my sleeves and saw him staring at Mother with wide eyes. "Pat!" I cried out, "Pat, where are you looking?" Abruptly, Mother jerked me forward and dragged me towards the door, whipping it open and revealing the dark, gloomy night sky.

"Rey!" I heard Pat shout out of nowhere. He was at the doorframe and I saw him screaming with Dad holding him back. "Rey, here! I'm looking here! I'm looking at you!"

And then he was gone...

Nine steps;


	3. Chapter 3

.::**The Meltdown**::. 

Nine Steps;

The idea came to me on a gloomy, rainy day, which strangely fit.

I was talking to Luna, and she was complaining about how serious I was. She was telling me about how I needed to loosen up more. Then, Sonia walked over and began speaking to me. And then Geo came, and then Zack and then Bud and then Solo.

"ReyRey, want to watch that one movie this weekend?" Sonia asked me brighty, over all of the voices around us.

"What movie?" I asked my pink haired classmate curiously. Luna looked over and grinned.

"Ohh! Look at the two lovebirds!" She sang, "Planning another date, are you guys?" She elbowed me and I glared up at her. Sonia laughed at this. "I don't know what you see in him, . He's a dark little boy and you're this happy girl without a worry in the world," Luna joked with a glint in her eye.

"I'd like to ask you the same question," Sonia said, grinning at her. "You're his best friend!"

I stared at them and then, suddenly, everyone was gathered around the two and chattering.

I sat quietly, watching them. I didn't bother putting in a word.

And suddenly, the strangest thought crossed my mind. What if I did this for an entire day? What if I stayed silent? What would happen?

Who would notice?

xxx

I threw on any old pair of clothes, one where I would blend in, so it would seem like any other day. Not one where I was testing the people around me. Testing myself.

The walk to school was normal. Nobody lived around me.

Luna was not in any of my classes. She took mostly easy ways to get an A, while I took the slightly more advanced classes. Sonia was in one of my elective classes, but not in today's.

When I stepped into first hour, I recieved no greeting. I never did, actually, so today was no different.

Second hour was also quiet. Even though Solo was in that class with me, he didn't talk to me. But he hadn't ever spoken to me in that class before, so no matter.

Third hour was passed over in silence. Not that I should've expected anything, I knew nobody in these classes of mine.

Fourth hour was no different. But it was alright because it never was. It was always quiet and boring.

Right after, lunch came around. I ended up entering the cafeteria late, as I had been finishing up a test the previous class period. I chose a line with nobody in it, and bought a slice of pizza, along with juice and a little container of fruit.

As soon as I did this, I headed towards the usual table I sat at. There, Luna was energetically speaking in the middle of a crowd of friends. The usual people. I sat myself down and began eating. None of them seemed to notice me.

"Lu-na!" Sonia's voice suddenly exclaimed, "Please don't tell me that we have another one of those PE test things next hour!" Luna turned to face her.

"Uh, oh," She stated.

"We do?" Her smile dissolved in a split second.

"Well, you're pretty good with sports so..." Luna said.

"Not at badminton!" Sonia complained, "I'm horrible at badminton! Ahh! The teacher hates me enough as it is! This is bad."

"Who cares about P.E. anyway?" Luna laughed, "It's a easy A class."

"I do!" She snapped, "Argh! I'm gonna go ask Belle!"

"What, you don't believe my input?" Luna called after her as she began to leave. The group laughed at her remark.

I stared straight at her. She pouted at Bud and Zack.

I picked up my lunch, not turning my head. She yawned.

I stepped away twice. She groaned and snuggled up to the lunch table, using her arms as a pillow.

I threw out my lunch and ran to the bathroom. No one followed.

xxx

The rest of the school day was filled with silence. No teachers called on me to answer any questions nor to read from the textbook. Usually, I would despise them if they did, but today I was just waiting for someone to call out my name.

Anyone.

But as I walked on home, I realized that this was a typical day of mine. Normal just like my outfit. Normal just like the weather. And it was okay, because normal was how it always was.

The only people that spoke to me often were Luna and Sonia. Often. Often?

Not often at all. Other than the occasional 'dates' and maybe hanging out, them speaking to me was an unusual case.

Today, the word 'Rey' had not come up even once. The thought 'Rey' did not come up even once. Today was a normal day.

I entered my house, waiting for my mother's welcoming call.

It did not come either.

I remembered that she was working late today at that moment. Not thinking about me. Thinking about different ways to convince people to buy houses.

I reached into the refridgerator, hoping for a small container that said 'Rey, here is your dinner for tonight. Microwave it for three minutes or so. - Love you, Mom'.

It was not there.

I grabbed an orange and sat down at the kitchen table, peeling it slowly. One, two, three. Piece by piece, until it was finally open and raw. I tore it in half, and peeled a piece off of the half-circle. I popped it into my mouth.

I chewed and began to swallow, but I suddenly could not.

It quickly slid down by itself and I felt myself choke. Coughs came from my throat, and I pounded my own chest until the orange came back up. I stood up slowly and walked towards the trash can. I lifted the lid and spit out the orange.

There it went. Just like me. Down the wrong road.

Fragile from the start, broken apart, chewed up, and covered in tears.

Eight Steps;


End file.
